2 Corinthians 1

⁹ Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.


This reminds me of teachings of our former pastor.  We grow in faith through sufferings.  It always makes me uncomfortable because I don't feel like I have had too many sufferings throughout my life and I'm not looking to find the kind of suffering that would make me feel like I received a death sentence as he suggests.


But I can definitely see and understand where facing challenges or having experiences outside my control and having to rely on God rather than myself does help strengthen my faith and reduce my self reliance.  Losing my dad was a hinge point for me, the biggest suffering I have faced and I had zero control of the situation.  It has helped me to better enjoy the time I have now with my family and decrease my worries about the future and things like work (not that I never worry, but I think I'm better).  God has a plan for me and my family and I don't need to try and direct it, I just need to ask him to show me what he wants me to do.  Like Paul, I need to be ready and willing to change course if that is His plan which is scary for me.